Herceptin 11

Herceptin 11 was on Tuesday, May 29.

Mom took her to the appointment. Doctors say Anne-Marie is anemic again.

Next time, on the 22nd of June, they're going to send her in for an echocardiogram to check her heart for damage from the treatments. Standard procedure.

Celebrating Anne-Marie's B-Day last weekend

Pics (T-B): Anne-Marie in front of OMSI, the Purple Room at Powell's, finishing chocolate hazelnut gelato in the car due to the crowds, me looking thrilled in front of La Provence, inside the restaurant

We spent this weekend celebrating Anne-Marie's birthday. We spent Friday night in Portland. As soon as I got home from work we went up to the Oregon Museum of Science and Industry (OMSI) Omnimax theater on the East Waterfront. This museum deserves a post all of its own it is so unique and fascinating to everyone who comes through town (and pretty much passe to all the locals). I've been going to this museum since before I remember, and do my best to take it as given that every major city has something like this.

We left the eastside around 8 PM and drove across the river to Powell's Books in the Pearl District. Powell's is the biggest bookstore in the world (68,000 sq. ft.)! We took in the Red Room (religion) and the Purple Room (history). That was enough for us, so we went across the street to Portland's top ice cream shop, Mio Gelato, to get some ice cream. 75 degrees at 9 PM on Memorial Day weekend made for a completely packed house.

We woke in the morning to take Anne-Marie to a long-awaited trip to La Provence, a French bakery and breakfast spot in Lake Oswego (the metro area's most affluent suburb). This restaurant, though very popular, is not in the trendy area of Lake Oswego. I enjoyed Eggs Benedicte, and Anne-Marie had an omelet. The coffee, muffins, and croissants are worth a try, too! From there I dropped Anne-Marie off at her dad's so he could take Fir Point Farms to pick out a hanging flower basket. I went to Tualatin to work on my favorite bridge.

Portland and Lake Oswego both probably deserve their own series of posts. I'll have to think about that one. Maybe a "Top 10 Spots" list for each...

The Reagan Diaries

Last Tuesday was the day of the release of the diaries of one of my personal heroes, the late President Ronald Reagan. The diaries were abridged into one volume for the public by Professor Douglas Brinkley. The scholar's set--probably an unabridged box set of three volumes or more--will be released in late 2008.

For now I plan on moving ahead with Truman, but I wonder if this was poor planning due to the obvious appeal of this release. The temptation is to put the 33rd chief executive on hold in deference to the 40th. I probably should stick to the plan. But I do hope to get to this one before the end of the year.

Happy 28th Birthday!

Blog hits 10,000

I'll never forget March 29, 1999, the day that the Dow Jones Industrial Average hit 10,000. Confetti flew, people shouted, and President Clinton pumped his fists while the cameras flashed. Today will probably not draw quite as much attention from the media, but it's a celebration nonetheless.

My 10,000th hit? Someone who came on around 1:25 this afternoon (5/22/07) using AOL, Internet Explorer 6, and Windows XP. Whoever you are, you better come clean. Don't slink off into the darkness like #5,000 did and leave us all wondering for the rest of our lives.

Biopsy results 2

I received the results of my second biopsy on Friday.

The results? They found nothing.

That's right...absolutely nuthin'.

Usually this would be good news, but when you have all the symptoms of what could be a serious condition, it's pretty frustrating. My follow-up visit is on June 6. I honestly don't know what to do about this.

A grand ol' time...

In La Grande!

We're here in Eastern Oregon for the final invitational tournament of the year, and getting ready for finals in June.

Thanks to our friends the Meaderds who invited us to come up early on Friday so we could attend the NW Apostolic Conference.

New John Adams $1 coin

The new $1 Presidential Coin series added the John Adams coin today, which is number 2 of what will probably be a 40-coin series. (A former president must be deceased for two years before he can be on a coin.) Most of you probably know that I'm a big fan of U.S. history, but, in addition to that, I'm also a big fan of our 2nd president and consider him very underrated.

The Washington coin is already hard to find: try to pick one of these up.

Here're a few good Adams quotes:

We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion. Avarice, ambition, revenge or gallantry would break the strongest cords of our Constitution as a whale goes through a net. Our Constitution is designed only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate for any other.

Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.

Our obligations to our country never cease but with our lives.

No man who ever held the office of president would congratulate a friend on obtaining it.

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress.

My top 10 memories from the first year of the blog

10. The "thank you" post from May 28,2006 - This post was an attempt to thank everyone for the different kindnesses they had shown in the first few weeks. Why wasn't this ever updated? At the time I didn't know that more than a hundred names would need to be added to the list within the next two weeks, and there have been many, many more since.

9. This post

8. The endless layout and template changes - Blogger has made the colors/fonts/templates changes easier than ever, and it's just way too tempting to mess with stuff.

7. Melanie Pollard's picture of Anne-Marie at LaGrande in 2005 - The picture was used as a placeholder for the first DARKSAYINGS post. It was really only a test post, but the picture received all kinds of compliments and was posted on other sites.

6. The story 'bout the robin - Even though this didn't receive the most comments (the type posted on the blog), it definitely was the most memorable. All kinds of people brought it up when I saw them in person.

5. When the blog went pink for NBCAM - I don't know if anyone even remembers this. I decided it would be neat to change the background color to the traditional Awareness Month pink. Some people really didn't like it.

4. The Notes on Surgery from June - I'm glad I wrote these; it's amazing how much you can forget. And if the digital version ever gets lost, some of you that read them can tell me what I said.

3. Last September's liveblogging from Providence Portland Medical Center - This was really amazing thing if you remember the days "before the web." I was sitting with my laptop next to Anne-Marie's hospital bed when we both wrote out the results of testing to everyone in real time.

2. All of the great comments that people left - We heard from people all over the country through comments posted on the blog and the e-mail links. We read all of them several times.

1. Going back this evening and re-reading the entire blog from beginning to end...and realizing just how worthwhile it all was

Happy Anniversary

D A R K S A Y I N G S

Happy 1-year, DARKSAYINGS! You're the best!

The Story of Diagnosis Day

When we woke up on Friday, May 12, 2006, we had no idea what the outcome of the previous Wednesday's test would be. We scheduled a weekend at a condo in Sunriver, Oregon, to think about the results, regardless of what they were. We both, by that time, were feeling physically ill due to the stress of the past few weeks. 

The drive to the 9:30 AM appointment at Dr. Shawn Morgan's office at Willamette Falls Hospital seemed to take forever. When checked in and sat for almost forty minutes. They were running twenty minutes late. We got into the room and sat. Dr. Morgan was running later than ther rest of the staff. (I wonder now if he was in his office trying to psych himself up.) 

He walked in and, as he was sitting down, he said suddenly, "It looks like the results of the biopsy showed that it WAS cancer." He immediately began to explain our options. 

I don't remember a thing he said except, "You're probably not going to remember anything that I tell you, but hopefully, between the two of you and my telling you over and over again, you'll remember some of this." Eventually, after many consultations with Drs. Morgan and Smith, we began to understand our options. 

We left the clinic to go pack our things. We stopped at Biscuits Cafe for breakfast; we were finally able to eat. As Anne-Marie got stuff ready at home, I found the phone list of people to call with the results. I made the list the day before because I knew that I wouldn't be able to think clearly enough when it came down to it. I made calls at home and halfway to Central Oregon.

What it felt like

When Dr. Morgan told us the news, it was as if all of life had slapped our face. That sounds strange, I know, but somehow, it was almost insulting. Maybe because it felt like it just couldn't be; it just shouldn't be.

I hope we, from that time until now, have learned not to trust our feelings. Whenever anyone experiences that frigid combination of uncertainty, unbelief, and just pure terror, it's hard to come back to the reality of the moment: that life is no more unpredictable and out of control than it was the moment before. One friend said it this way: "All the things in life we hold so dear are tenuous at best."

The breakfast from Biscuits didn't sit well. I was sick the whole time at Sunriver.

Herceptin 10

Testing is over (w/ initial report)

I went in for my last test yesterday. The initial report says that I need to start taking Prilosec. The rest will have to wait for two to three weeks while the lab does its work.

I'm feeling sick and tired...in more ways than one. I'll let you all know!

Meanwhile, I'm working on the second Truman report and the anniversary edition of the blog.

Test tomorrow

The 9th is tomorrow; time for my next test with Dr. Chang. I'll start off tomorrow with a liquid only diet. Anne-Marie will be taking me to the clinic at noon tomorrow so I can enjoy a serving of drinkable chalk.

The test only lasts fifteen minutes, but the sedative lasts for the rest of the day. My wife will have to drive me home and send me straight to bed.

New Project: Lower Burnett Bridge

Here is a greyscale rendering of the new project that I've been working on for the past few weeks. I finished the three-dimensional model yesterday and produced this .jpg. The Lower Burnett Bridge is a 400-foot span triple pinned-arch timber bridge that is sloped and curved. It will be built in the late summer in Buckley, Washington.

May is Milestone Month

Four major milestones are coming up within the next two weeks that I thought were worth mentioning. First is the one year anniversary of diagnosis day on May 12. 

Next is the one year anniversary of the birth of DARKSAYINGS on the 14th. This will be followed up very quickly with a celebration of the 10,000th visitor to the blog. I hope to post something significant in recognition of each of these events, along with the other stuff. 

 Oh, yeah...what about the fourth milestone? Your looking at it right now: post #200.

Truman Report I

Here is the first report on what I learned from David McCullough's Truman. Hold on to your hats, everybody.

Harry S. Truman was born on May 8, 1884 to John Anderson Truman and Martha Ellen Young Truman. He was born into a family that had moved to, what was then considered, the "far west." His family was relatively unknown except that his great uncle was Jim Crow Chiles (yes, that Jim Crow). The family did their best to avoid the subject even many years after Jim Crow was killed in a gunfight on the streets of Independence.

Harry grew up in and around the Independence, Missouri area, and was always considered the model child among his friends at school. He began taking piano lessons at a very young age and preferred indoor activities, especially reading, to the rough-and-tumble games of his little brother and the other kids. "To tell the truth," he once said, "I was kind of a sissy." (Yeah...can I be a sissy, too?)

He met Bess (Elizabeth) Wallace when he was six at Sunday School. He claimed to have been in love with her from then on. The feelings were not mutual, mostly due to Bess's higher social standing.

For financial reasons, Harry's family moved all around the western area of Missouri until finally ending up at the family farm. Harry graduated from high school in the meantime and began to pursue Bess, with a little help from Bess's neighbors, Ethel and Nellie Noland, who were Harry's cousins.

Within a few years, Truman got into the banking industry and was doing well. He even worked up the nerve to propose to Bess in a letter in 1911. She waited three weeks to flatly refuse him.

A few years later, however, after Harry had left a very successful career in banking to take charge of the family farm, Bess came around and they began to talk about marriage. In April of 1917, the United States joined World War I, and Harry decided to enlist. Bess demanded that they marry before he was deployed. This time it was Harry's turn to refuse, citing his fear that she would be made into a young widow if they married prior to his departure.

Pic: Truman at age 25